A Different Kind of Thanksgiving

This last week has worn me out. Literally. I feel like I got hit by a bus sometime around Sunday or Monday, and I never recovered. By Thursday, I was grumpy and annoyed by every little thing. I think because I was so tired I was a little more emotional than usual. It was also our first holiday in Mozambique since moving here. I was thinking about my family being together, doing all the holiday traditions we’ve done for so long.

As the day of thanks went on, it felt nothing like the Thanksgiving’s I remembered. I was frustrated by a challenge we’ve been facing regarding the vehicle’s we purchased for the orphanage, the custom’s office was asking for an outrageous amount of money for a small package my family had sent us, and our project file was still in the same office, without a building permit or document for legalization of the land. I prayed over my frustration and asked God to help me get it together.

I was also HOT. I was so hot. It was over 100 degrees that day and the sun was so bright, and the humidity was out of control. We tried to minimize our walking that day to only what was necessary, but we had a lot to do, and we are both healthy so walking was definitely an option. We walked a lot, stopped when we needed a break, drank a lot of cold water, and tried to relax our minds over the challenges we were facing. We prayed together that God would help us let everything go and let Him handle it for us.

Understanding why things are so difficult here has been a real challenge to me. However, we’ve learned a lot in the 3 short months we have been here. The problem is simple to identify: OPPRESSION.

The impoverished people of this nation have been taken advantage of by outsiders for hundreds of years. Oppression leads to poverty, and poverty leads to corruption, and corruption leads to a culture shift. Corruption becomes abundant in the culture, though it is not inherent. It becomes a way of life for everyone in the system. There is little anyone can do to escape the systematic cycle and navigating the system is like swimming in a stormy sea without a life vest. At times, we have thought we were going to drown because we refused to "tip" (bribe) someone. However, God has always put someone in our path to help us, and for that, I am forever grateful.

Despite my annoyance, God worked a miracle and we were able to take our package home. We also had positive movement in our challenge with our vehicles, and we were told to expect a result early this week. We have been battling this issue for nearly 3 months, since we first arrived. But God is faithful, and He has everything in His hands.

Here is what I personally learned from this Thanksgiving: Relax, and give thanks even in the midst of frustration. And, honestly, what is 3 months?! We’ve only been here a VERY short time, and already God has moved mountains on our behalf. Who else gets FREE land from the government for a project like this, or concession on paying several thousand dollars for building and legalization, or personal assistance from the governor?! We are so blessed, friends. We are beyond blessed. How could I possibly have been so annoyed?! How could I have let little mole hills grow into mountains?!

We serve a mighty God who loves the fatherless, the helpless and the voiceless. We serve a God who promises to never leave any one of us. We serve a God who promises to be a father to the fatherless, to defend the poor and helpless, to fight for the oppressed and voiceless. He promises that when we tell Him of our plans & commit them to Him, we will be successful.

We NEVER have to worry. We will be successful, in Jesus’ name! We give God all the praise for what He has already done, and what He will do on behalf of the children in this community. We have nothing to complain about, nothing to worry about and nothing to stress about. We have everything we need to be successful – our success is not because of our own ability, but because of the way God has worked on our behalf, in the years before we came. God knows what He is doing, and we will continue to walk the path He guides us down, in obedience to whatever God asks of us.

Pray for us as we continue on this journey and put a home on this land that will care for the most vulnerable of children, the most oppressed & burdened little people of this land. Pray that the financial needs of the orphanage are met, pray for our building permit to come out this week, and pray for our courage & strength to continue to be abundant.

Phil, Laura & Jadon, too

Nonsense = Distractions

I don’t like giving nonsense attention. Nonsense becomes a distraction from what really ACTUALLY matters: a distraction from the truth, a distraction from what God desires for us to spend our energy and time on.  However, I think the world likes nonsense. Every time I get on the Internet, there is some kind of nonsense distraction: 10 ways to make blah blah blah better; some semi-famous someone showed up to some awards show wearing next to nothing; some giant coffee company (with terrible coffee) offends the world with a red cup, etc. 

I admit I am more than guilty for reading sleazy celebrity gossip or reading about the 10 ways I’m not doing enough for my husband or the 10-ways-I’m-ruining-my-child–who-will-need-therapy-for-the-rest-of-his-life. I like to be distracted sometimes because it means I don’t have to focus on what I really should be doing. But that’s the problem – the nonsense distracts me from what I should really be doing, from what I should be thinking about.

Here is why nonsense is soooooo detrimental to our culture today: it becomes our focus. Being distracted isn’t really the problem; the issue is that we begin to see the distraction as our main focus, leaving behind the most important values we claim to hold on to as believers. One of the values that is slowly slipping away is community.

I love to say the word “community.” I can’t say it without smiling or thinking about times in my life when I had amazing community. The best time of my life, when I had amazing community, has gone. Yes, I said it, gone. And, mostly because it’s my own fault. We’ve moved a few times in the last 2 years, and it takes a toll. I’ve always loved being engaged in my community and church, and in the last 2 years, I’ve really withdrawn myself. I have no idea why, other than I was nervous. I wasn’t sure we could find people to mesh with – people who could understand how crazy our lives are and understand how we don’t have a lot of time for much other than work and family. Of course, we wanted God at the center of everything, but we weren’t prioritizing Him well. We put Him at the back of our minds instead of at the front.

When we began to feel God tugging at our hearts and minds at the beginning of the year, pulling distractions from us little by little, I personally felt a lot of disconnect with God. I had been working, on average, 60+ hours a week in child protection, which is a very rewarding job. However, it took the life out of me. I enjoyed every minute of it, but that career is a very traumatizing one, with countless hours spent without pay, and without your family. It was flexible at times, so I enjoyed the flexibility, but in the end, it took as much energy from me as working 2 full time jobs. I didn’t have my priorities straight, and I fell out of sync in my relationship with God. He knew that by drawing me closer to this project I would naturally draw back to Him, which is exactly what happened.

I now look around me and see that even in Mozambique, I can easily become distracted again. I have to refocus myself at times when I feel anxious or worried. We are also slowly growing a community around ourselves again, full of people both near and far, who love us, help guide us spiritually, and help us to grow in our relationship with the Lord.

Moving back to Mozambique has definitely grown my relationship with God over the last year and trusting Him to provide guidance, financial means and support. I trust Him for every need, and I no longer worry about ANY T-H-I-N-G. Honestly. For example, we need $30,000 to start building our orphanage. We need a large dump truck for building the orphanage, which will cost around $10,000. Countless other needs and small obstacles, not to mention our own personal financial needs. At this stage in my life, I trust God to meet each need. NONE of these things make me even bat an eye. I have not a single doubt in my mind that God will meet every need.

Don’t get me wrong – we don’t wake up every morning and say, “Okay, God! Work your magic,” and then sit around and do nothing. While we’re waiting for our building approval, we are as productive as possible. We apply for private grants, public grants, any grant that has money to give to an organization that cares for children. We build relationships within our community here, while continuing to build relationships in the U.S. We work as hard as we can doing the things we know how to do, and we try to learn the things we don’t yet understand or know. God promises to see us through, but God expects us to use the skills He has given us to do whatever we can to make the process move forward. God has blessed each of us with skills to do more than sit by and wait.

So, my dear friend, if you are distracted or out of sync in your relationship with God, sit down and look at your priorities. Make a plan of how to get them back into shape. Make a list of what you want your priorities to be, and then work backwards from there. I know my life has been forever changed because God comes first now. This doesn’t guarantee that life will be any easier, however, it does guarantee an amazing sense of peace in the midst of it all. And, never under estimate the power of a community of people who will love you, lift you up when you feel like you can’t go on, and help you to grow in your relationship with God. We were created for community so don’t neglect it!

If you think of us in the coming weeks, please pray for us and our financial needs. We know that God is great and He will work all of this out in His timing, and better than we ever imagined. We would be honored to pray for you as well, whatever you are walking through. Email us at heartfortheneedy@gmail.com, or comment below and we’ll add you to our prayer list.

With lots of love,

Phil & Laura, and Jadon, too

6 little words...

I have been waiting for this day to come since we moved to Mozambique. The 6 words would come at some point – I knew it was a matter of WHEN, not IF. I think Phil & I both knew that moving to a 3^rd world country with a 5-year-old wasn’t exactly going to be easy for either of us who had become accustomed to our life in the U.S., let alone our little man who has never known any other place than the U.S. And, even if it was because he was in trouble, it still cut right to my heart when he said it last weekend: “I just want to go home.” This phrase came out of J’s mouth followed by about 30 minutes of crying and asking me why we can’t “go back.”

I had rehearsed what I would say in my head a few times before this happened. I thought I would say something like: “Why? Doesn’t this place feel like home?” Or, “Don’t you want us to stay so you can go to your awesome school and be with your cousins?”

Despite being well rehearsed, I couldn’t say much. I knew deep inside that he didn’t choose this monumental change: WE chose it. Phil & I know God has brought us here, called us here, and we are committed to doing whatever it takes to make living here work so we can meet the needs of the vulnerable children in this area. We talked with Jadon a lot about moving, about leaving our house and our dog and most of our possessions behind. We talked with Jadon about the WHYs of moving, and what we wanted to accomplish by moving to Mozambique. The reality, though, was Jadon had no say in this move; he had not control & no choice in the matter. Period.

Another part of me wanted to tell him how blessed we are to have this opportunity. I wanted to explain to him that the majority of people in this world don’t have their own bedroom, a pile of toys and 2 parents who can provide for him. I wanted to explain to him he is privileged and spoiled. But I knew that wasn’t going to do any good either. After all, I thought to myself, he’s only 5, MOM! So, I did my best to explain as lovingly as I could.

Waiting at the airport in Ethiopia - August 2015

At first, I struggled to convey the message to J why we can’t just “go home.” Thankfully, we had been on an outing earlier in the day and he had experienced (probably for the first time) people begging on the street, and we saw 2 street boys sleeping under a bench. He was really bothered by what he saw, so we talked to a few to show him not to be afraid, and when we got home we talked about how we could help people who don’t have a home. I think he was beginning to understand WHY we are here.

When he said he wanted to go home, I asked him a lot of questions. After talking and crying for a little while he said he wants us to stay and help kids like the 2 boys we saw earlier in the day, and we talked about what Phil & I can do to make him feel like this place is his home. Overall, he seems to need a little space and a little alone time with Mom & Dad, which I think we can arrange without a problem. He also said he can’t wait for us to live in our own house (ME TOO!!). I know it hasn’t been easy to go from being an only child to having 4 siblings all of a sudden, but it has only been a few months verses his 5 years alone.

Jadon has also been memorizing Psalm 23, so after we talked and I explained to him why we can’t leave, he said his memory verses. I explained to him that God will lead us through anything in life, and He will be everything to us when we feel sad or worried or scared, or even when we feel like we want to go back to our “home.” I have no idea if any of our conversation sunk in, but I really hope it did. If nothing else, it was a good way for us to spend a quiet minute together.

I know “I just want to go home,” may rear its head again, and next time it may not be Jadon. But God is bigger than “I want to go home,” bigger than fear, bigger than any amount of money, bigger than any obstacle. We knew this wouldn’t be easy. We knew there would be an adjustment period for us, for Jadon, for our family here. We knew moving across the world, away from family and friends, would have its struggles, joys and frustrations. But the best part about God is He can be EVERYTHING to us in each of those seasons. In times when we feel lonely, we know God will comfort us. When there is a season of frustration or sadness, God will be there. He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. We never have to fear. We find great comfort in knowing that we will never be alone.