Be STILL

ALL of our kiddos are off to school today. The house is quiet, and for the first time in what feels like years, I have a moment to sit down with my steaming mug of life-giving coffee, my blanket and my Bible.

This cool season brings very cool temps in the mornings, before the sun is in full effect. Being a Colorado girl, you'd think it would be nothing for me. But the difference is: 100% humidity - the chills sets in when you least expect it, usually followed by a cough. So I take every opportunity I can to pretend like it's a blizzarding Colorado winter, and cuddle up on the couch.

As I am following my Bible plan on my phone, a plan to read the WHOLE Bible in one year, I realize I'm way behind. Like, 100 days or so! This doesn't mean I don't read my Bible, but sometimes I'm looking things up or studying for a woman's group or a class at church or a class I'm teaching. It's rare that I get to sit down and follow the chapters and verses listed out for me each day.

I decide instead of playing catch-up and not getting a lot out of each day, I'd read my lesson for the day. If I have time, I'll come back and do another in the afternoon & one before bed. I'll get caught up in no time.

I open my Bible to Exodus, chapter 14. This is one of my favorite books of the Bible, as Moses is literally leading the Israelites out of Egypt. This chapter focuses on the Israelites fleeing their captors, with the Egyptians on their heels.

And then verse 14 caught me so off guard, and made my eyes well up with tears:

"The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still."

God speaks right to us when we need to hear it. I needed this word SO badly today. And right before this, Moses tells the people to not be afraid, to stand firm, and watch God deliver them from the Egyptians.

I may not have an army chasing after me, and a giant body of water in front of me, with seemingly no where to run, but there are times I feel like a frightened Israelite. I have tried many a times to remember not to worry, to remember that God is faithful, that God is with us and for us, and not against us. But at times, it's so easy to feel so disconnected, so far away from those we love and those who love us, and so inadequate at this whole parenting & ministry gig.

There are days when I feel so ineffective, so tired, so ready to move into a new season. And there are days when I feel like the most blessed, fulfilled person on the face of the planet. But these are feelings, not always an accurate and reliable source for me.

Then God gives me moments like this morning: He is fighting for us. He just wants me to be still. I know God will always provide, I know God will always see us through every trial, and I know who I am in Him. Being still is sometimes the hardest part for me.

Beloved, if you're feeling like there are a thousand armies chasing after you today, in your marriage, in your finances, in your children, your ministry...God knows your need. God knows what you're going through. But we have to let Him fight for us. We have to be still.

I recently started attending a Bible study with an incredible group of ladies here in Nampula. It's a study by Lisa TerKeurst, called Uninvited. There's a section in the study where she says:

                                    God is good.
                                    God is good to me.
                                    God is good at being God.
                                    And today is yet another page
                                      in our great love story.

This has been a beautiful mantra for me over the last few weeks. Having a baby, having crazy hormonal stuff going on, as well as an upcoming trip away from this country - my home now - for an extended period of time, has really run me ragged.

My overtired brain & body can't seem to rest most nights. I lay awake thinking about Jadon's school fees, the plane ticket I slapped on my credit card, how will the kids do while I'm away for so long, will my absence cause more trauma, Phil is going to be all alone, shouldering everything. But when I speak my mantra over these worries, and remember that God is fighting for me; I can finally rest.

God is good at being God. He doesn't need me to interfere. He doesn't need my assistance. God doesn't need anything from me. He doesn't really need me at all! Yet, he WANTS me and YOU. He loves each of us, no matter what we've done or how we've failed. There is nothing we could ever do to make him love us more or less. What a reminder, eh?!

I hope this little mantra from Lisa will help you to remember that God is in control, and he only needs us to be still. I'm praying that you will find rest in Him when you feel weary. In fact, I'm thinking I've earned a nap.